Teal Swan

Warning: This text comprises descriptions some readers might discover upsetting

The pencil drawing of the long-haired, hanging girl had been of their residence for a while. However Sarah thought nothing of it. Her daughter Casey had been a gifted artist and spent many hours absorbed in her artwork work.

It was solely later that Sarah began to marvel about its significance and felt compelled to research. She quickly discovered that Casey had posted it on-line. The caption subsequent to it merely learn: “The beautiful girl is Teal Swan, a beloved spectacular non secular guru.”

Casey had taken her personal life simply a few months earlier than. Sarah, devastated by the lack of her solely daughter, needed to attempt to perceive extra about her closing weeks.

Who was this girl who had been such a topic of fascination for the 18-year-old?

Teal Swan picture in progress

Teal Swan is a self-declared non secular instructor who calls herself a “private transformation revolutionary” and “non secular catalyst”.

Born in Utah as Mary Teal Bosworth, she runs retreats within the US and Central America. She has a whole bunch of hundreds of followers throughout social media – her YouTube channel has greater than 79 million views.

Her model centres on giving psychological well being recommendation, a lot of which is aimed toward individuals who really feel depressed, or suicidal. Swan, whose beliefs embody reincarnation and the ability of crystal therapeutic, says her expertise as a survivor of a number of suicide makes an attempt offers her specific perception that she claims psychological well being professionals lack.

Swan says her intention is to assist people who find themselves in disaster and many individuals say her teachings have helped them once they have been suicidal.

However Swan’s critics accuse her of risking the glorification of loss of life, and psychological well being consultants that I spoke to referred to as a few of her approaches “irresponsible” and “harmful”.

Sarah sits in her lounge in north-west US, Christian music enjoying softly within the background as daylight streams by the home windows.

She and her husband inform me in regards to the name that shattered their world – the one wherein they came upon their daughter had taken her life.

Illustration of 'Sarah', the mother of 'Casey,' on the phonePicture copyright
Katherine Lam

Whereas Sarah knew Casey had been coping with the ache of a latest break-up, she had no thought simply how dangerous she had been feeling, or what she had been contemplating doing.

Sarah started trawling her daughter’s social media accounts for clues.

She noticed that Casey had shared her pencil portrait on Fb with the caption figuring out it as Teal Swan, and shortly realised her daughter had joined the “Teal Tribe” – a non-public Fb group, which suggests solely members can see what’s in it.

Sarah joined the group and was horrified at what she found. She learn a put up by her daughter saying that she had tried to take her personal life. The image with the put up was a inventory picture of a girl holding two fingers to her head like a gun.

In response, two folks, together with one of many volunteers that assist reasonable content material within the group, replied with Swan’s video entitled “I need to kill myself (What to do in the event you’re suicidal)”.

Within the video Swan urges those that are feeling suicidal to hunt medical assist, however goes on to say that in her expertise, for some folks, this may occasionally not assist long-term. She as a substitute means that suicide be seen as “our security internet or our re-set button that is at all times accessible to us”. She argues that viewing it on this means allows folks to set the thought apart, and as a substitute focus on what they will do to make themselves really feel higher within the current.

She additionally suggests an train wherein viewers are informed to lie down on the ground and picture their deaths in “grisly element”. Swan argues within the video that by doing so viewers will realise that there’s “nowhere to go however again to life… so why go away?”

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She stresses within the video that killing oneself would “create a devastating ripple” for family members, and “it does matter if you’re right here or not right here… You do not need to die. What you need is an finish to your ache.”

The video was among the many prime leads to a Google search on phrases associated to suicide once we considered it in early November.

Illustration of 'Casey' looking at an image of her computer of Teal SwanPicture copyright
Katherine Lam

We have no idea if Casey watched that video, and if she did accomplish that, we can’t understand how, if in any respect, it might have influenced her closing deadly determination. However her posts shortly earlier than she died do mirror among the language that Swan herself makes use of, together with references to rebirth.

Her mom Sarah is livid that posting the video was the one response from the Teal Tribe group to Casey’s message, and that no-one referred to as the police, or made any try to contact the household.

Simply two weeks after Casey posted about her preliminary suicide try, she shot herself and died.

“What an enormous missed alternative and an unimaginable mistake,” Sarah says.

“Whereas I imagine that there [was] multiple undercurrent occurring within the lifetime of our daughter, you would need to persuade me in any other case that Teal’s teachings didn’t play a big function within the thoughts of our daughter when she took her life.

“It is virtually like a rehearsal,” Sarah says of the recommendation within the video.

To seek out out extra, I joined the closed Teal Tribe Fb group of greater than 27,000 members and noticed many posts that I discovered disturbing. There have been repeated discussions of suicide, with folks saying they needed to finish their lives, and group members providing recommendation.

Typically suicide prevention traces got in response to posts. However many occasions, solely Swan’s video on what to do in the event you really feel suicidal was posted, together with recommendation from different members.

Throughout the weeks that I tracked the group, I came upon that one other younger member of the discussion board had additionally taken their very own life inside days of posting about feeling suicidal.

Instructing in individual

In addition to educating on-line, Swan hosts workshops in individual throughout the US and Europe. Tickets value as much as $200. I went to 1 in Chicago, and met followers who clearly really feel an intense connection together with her.

One informed me Swan is “altering the world”. One other referred to as her a “genius of human relationship connection and perception”.

The occasion lasted for about six hours, with viewers members being referred to as up on stage, the place Swan would give them recommendation. They talked about deeply private points, from abuse, to suicidal emotions. One man stated he watched her movies for 5 hours each night time.

I met Swan after the workshop, and requested how she would reply to those that accuse her of encouraging suicide.

At first she laughed at that concept, saying: “That is fairly humorous. It is actually humorous to me.”

If you happen to have a look at the demographic of people who find themselves focused on my kind of fabric – you are working with an unstable group of individuals.Teal Swan

Then she took a extra critical tone.

She stated to name her a proponent of suicide was “ridiculous” and stated that anybody who does so clearly hasn’t watched her movies.

Once I put it to her that two younger individuals who have been members of her group had taken their lives, the environment grew tense.

“I’m not conscious of them,” she answered.

She then grew visibly indignant, saying that she was the rationale extra folks hadn’t killed themselves.

“If you happen to have a look at the demographic of people who find themselves focused on my kind of fabric – you are working with an unstable group of individuals.

“[To suggest I am] liable for suicide in individuals who got here to me suicidal, that is fairly insane.”

When it got here to her Fb group Swan admitted that she does really feel loads of nervousness.

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“That is the worst a part of my profession,” she informed me.

“You begin a Fb group hoping that it should be a spot for all these people to return to. Then as an instance anyone does determine to kill themselves out of this massive group of people who find themselves already struggling earlier than they get to you.

What you are doing if you inform anyone to visualise how they will kill themselves, is you are telling them to practise of their mindDr Jonathan Singer

“I am making an attempt to get moderators who’re on totally different time zones however as an instance certainly one of us does not see it [a suicidal post]. And now anyone says you need to have seen it. Now it is your fault they dedicated suicide.

“We take into consideration this on a regular basis. You have obtained people who find themselves susceptible. What are you imagined to do when you possibly can’t catch all of it?”

However she additionally admitted that the volunteers who assist run the web page obtain no coaching and few directions on what to do in the event that they do see posts wherein somebody says they really feel suicidal.

“Typically it looks like you will have a psych ward, with no one tending the constructing and you may’t afford to pay them to attend the constructing. And who’s going to signal on for that kind of a job anyhow?”

I put it to her that maybe social media will not be the proper discussion board for such delicate discussions.

“That is really my query I ask myself so much [and] I take into consideration my 15-year-old self,” she says.

“I am enthusiastic about what I’d have needed when it was three o’clock within the morning and all people else in my family was asleep.

“If there had been anyone on a YouTube video telling me learn how to really feel in another way I’d have needed that.”

We’ll by no means know whether or not anybody who took their life was influenced by Swan’s teachings. Certainly Swan maintains that folks inform her on a regular basis that she has helped them.

In a press release Swan informed us that: “Suicide is rarely the reply. My teachings are designed to assist folks select life. Any suicide is a tragedy, and we ship our deepest condolences to this younger girl’s household.”

She additionally added that “many psychological well being professionals assist my teachings”.

Since our interview Swan has launched one other video, making it “crystal clear” that she’s in opposition to suicide, and that her intention is to assist folks, and definitely to not encourage the act. She says she is making an attempt to de-stigmatise discussions round suicide.

And destigmatising the problem is one thing each psychological well being professional I spoke to throughout my investigation informed me was wanted.

Consultants’ issues

However all of them raised issues about points of Swan’s teachings.

A type of consultants is Dr Jonathan Singer, the president of the American Affiliation of Suicidology.

“Once I heard Teal say that suicide is usually a ‘re-set button’ I used to be disturbed,” he tells me.

“It suggests you possibly can kill your self and that issues will begin over once more and be higher, and that isn’t true.”

“She’s obtained these concepts that in her thoughts are solely useful. However for others could possibly be actually harmful.”

“What you are doing if you inform anyone to visualise how they will kill themselves, is you are telling them to practise of their thoughts,” he says.

He explains that analysis exhibits this kind of imagery rehearsal is “a really efficient means of bettering your precise skill to do one thing”. For instance, it’s one thing that Olympic-level athletes use, he says.

“And so to inform anyone to assume by how they will kill themselves, that is not secure.”

I additionally spoke to Ged Flynn, the CEO of the UK suicide prevention charity Papyrus, and confirmed him Swan’s video which advises viewers to think about their deaths.

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“It isn’t useful in any circumstances to encourage anybody who has ideas of suicide to think about their being useless and additional to glorify that state,” he stated. “This train can solely result in the chance of hurt and even loss of life. Such workout routines are irresponsible. She is risking the glorification of suicide.”

Swan argues this system is about taking unconscious suicidal ideations, and consciously going to a unique place with them – leading to a extra optimistic final result.

Dr Singer can be involved about the place and the way Swan’s content material is being shared.

He argues that whereas it may be useful for folks in related conditions to supply one another assist, boards like Fb can turn out to be “like an echo chamber”.

“If you happen to’re suicidal and also you go on a discussion board and all people’s posting about being suicidal, then it normalises being suicidal.”

In Dr Singer’s view, social media corporations ought to do extra to control content material, and to assist folks attain out to individuals who might need to hurt themselves.

He argues that their expertise must be sufficiently developed at this stage to allow them to take motion.

“I feel they completely ought to intervene when persons are suicidal.”

In response to our investigation, Fb has closed down the Teal Tribe closed discussion board, telling us that: “In session with suicide and self-harm prevention consultants, our insurance policies permit some content material which expresses an intention in direction of suicide or self-harm as a possibility for somebody to answer what could also be a cry for assist. Nevertheless, we don’t permit content material which instantly promotes or encourages suicide or self-harm.”

Nevertheless among the members have arrange a brand new Fb group referred to as “Phoenix Tribe.” Whereas it’s not administered by Teal Swan, at the least one senior individual from her administration group is a member, and already I’ve seen folks speaking about feeling suicidal, with no helplines provided from different members.

YouTube informed us that they “try to strike a steadiness between prohibiting movies that encourage harmful acts, whereas additionally providing a spot the place folks can speak overtly and truthfully about their ideas and experiences”.

They stated the video wherein Swan means that the viewer imagines their very own loss of life has now been eliminated for violating their insurance policies. However it’s nonetheless up on at the least one different individual’s channel, and has been shared throughout the new Fb group.

Illustration of 'Casey''s parents comforting each otherPicture copyright
Katherine Lam

Of their quiet suburban residence in north-west US, a mom and a father are nonetheless struggling to return to phrases with the loss of life of their daughter.

My dialog with Sarah and her husband has stretched from afternoon to the night, as they share how their household has been modified eternally.

They now not have a house telephone, so robust was its affiliation with the devastating name that modified their lives.

Sarah says she hopes that in sharing their story, they will help another person.

“Life is treasured. Life is a present. Life does not include a reset button.

“And in the event you’re feeling susceptible, [a] video will not be the authority on a subject of this nature.

“Go speak to your pastor, [or] somebody who loves you, somebody who cares about you. That is your authority on a subject of this nature.”

Further reporting: Joanne Whalley

Some names have been modified

Getting assist

Canada and US:

From Canada or US: If you happen to’re in an emergency, please name 911

Within the US, you possibly can name the Nationwide Suicide Prevention Lifeline on 1-800-273-8255 (TALK), or the Disaster Check Line by texting HOME to 741741, or go to SpeakingOfSuicide.

Younger folks in want of assist can name Youngsters Assist Cellphone on 1-800-668-6868


In case you are within the UK, you possibly can name the Samaritans on 116123

BBC Motion Line has assist and extra data on emotional misery